By Your Side
by Corinne
Summary: Part 11 ----CHRIS-TRISH-JEFF ... the love triangle continues---thanks for the reviews so far...finally an update, I know! I'm trying!
1. Default Chapter

Note: This is my first try at a Trish/Jericho fic but damn it I'm just a sucker for that storyline. This takes place a couple of years ago when WWE tried that Jeff/Trish angle...  
  
Chris watched from the shadows of the arena as Trish walked out of the women's locker room. He started walking after her...then turned around...then looked back. Damn it, why is this always so hard! He thought to himself. He turned around when he heard someone else's voice ring out through the hallway.  
  
"Hey Trish!"  
  
"Hey Jeff," She answered turning around. Her eyes glowed when she turned around.  
  
"So umm...that was some kiss you laid on me today." Jeff said, grinning shyly.  
  
"Yeah, well...whatever I can do for the fans." Trish looked down on the floor. She knew that the kiss had nothing whatsoever to do with the fans. It was just pure emotion.  
  
"Right...the fans. Was that all?" Jeff asked hesitantly.  
  
Chris held his breath. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He knew that they had the story line together, but he had never actually thought that it would progress to anything more. Jeff knew how he felt about Trish....  
  
"Well...ummm...no." Trish answered quietly.  
  
"I thought so." Jeff placed his finger under her chin and pushed her face up to meet his eyes. He leaned down and kissed her softly.  
  
"What was that for?" Trish asked, her eyes closed.  
  
"I really like you Trish. I know that you don't like dating guys from the Fed, but how about it? You and me?"  
  
"Are you serious?"  
  
"Absolutely." Jeff replied self assuredly.  
  
"Ok...dinner tomorrow night?" She asked breathlessly. Her face glowed with happiness.  
  
"See you then." Jeff said, kissing her once more before he turned around and walked away.  
  
Trish watched as he left and as soon as the door to the men's locker room shut, let out a happy scream then grabbed her cell phone and called a friend.  
  
"Oh my god! He asked me out...finally!!!" She giggled as she walked away.  
  
Chris leaned against the wall and unclenched his fists. He couldn't believe it. Trish and Jeff? One of his best friends...with the girl of HIS dreams?  
  
***anyways I know that's real short for a first chapter but I figured I'd see what you guys thought of it first...btw I haven't decided whether or not this whole fic should be Chris/Trish or Jeff/Trish --- which pairing would you guys like to see most? Leave one. 


	2. Slight Confrontation

Chapter 2  
  
"Hey Chris I need to talk to you man!" Jeff yelled out when he saw his friend coming out of the arena. He had been waiting for a half an hour outside for him.  
  
"Not now Hardy." Chris muttered as he pulled out the keys to his car from his pocket and walked away quickly.  
  
"No seriously dude! I gotta talk to you. It's about Trish." Jeff said cautiously.  
  
Chris stopped mid-stride and turned around slowly.  
  
"What about her?" He asked gravely.  
  
"I...I asked her out and she said yes." Jeff chewed on his bottom lip as he watched his friend's reaction. He couldn't help himself...Trish liked him anyways, not Chris. Why should he and Trish have to suffer? Chris swallowed hard. Somehow it was harder to hear coming from his friend. "I know...I saw you ask her out." Chris said quietly.  
  
"Look, I don't want this affect our friendship, but I really like her and she likes me." Jeff explained ardently.  
  
"Yeah I know." Chris looked into his friend's eyes and knew that he was serious. He knew that he had waited too long.  
  
"So," Jeff began, Chris had been staring at him intently for five minutes. "Are you cool with this?"  
  
"Yeah, man...it's fine. Just umm do me a favor. Don't hurt her ok?" Chris began. "And umm...I don't think I can watch you guys together. Don't expect me to hang around."  
  
"Chris...look I didn't realize until Adam told me that..." Jeff said unhappily.  
  
"It's fine...just don't hurt her." Chris said again and then walked away.  
  
***Thanks for all the feedback...Seems fairly even as far Jeff/Trish or Chris/Trish pairing is going to take place...but here's your second chapter...I'm kinda leaning towards Chris right now, just cause...he's so cute and he's scoring up some serious brownie points as far as being all cute and sad that Trish is taken...and Jeff's MIA in North Carolina somewhere...but we'll see...let me know what you guys think 


	3. Just A Friend

MUAHAHHAHAHA ATTACK OF THE CHICK FLICKS  
  
Chapter 3  
  
Chris walked moodily through the lobby of the hotel. He was fucking pathetic. Jeff was a good guy. He deserved someone like Trish. Stupid writers...why couldn't they write him into one of those damn storylines.  
  
"Chris! Chris!"  
  
He closed his eyes. Here we go again...always a friend. He pasted a smile quickly to his face as he turned around.  
  
"Hey Babe...how's it going?"  
  
"Oh my god...you will never guess what just happened. Jeff asked me out." Trish smiled proudly. "I'm so excited, I mean I know I never said it, but he is just so hot. I mean he's gorgeous and sweet and..." She looked up at him curiously, "hey...you okay?"  
  
"What?" Chris asked...shit the smile must have slipped off.  
  
"You umm looked kinda pissed off there all of a sudden." She said worriedly.  
  
"Nah, I'm just tired you know."  
  
"Ok well...umm everyone's basically either out or asleep but I'm way too excited to sleep so I was just wondering if you wanted to go up and watch a movie." Chris and her had become friends these past few months and she just loved spending time with him.  
  
"Um..." Chris began hesitantly. "What about Jeff?"  
  
'Well, he's going out with the guys and I don't wanna seem over eager or anything. Come on, I'll give you a massage." Trish smiled.  
  
Chris stared down at her and sighed. She was completely clueless as to how much he liked her.  
  
"I'll pass on the massage tonight, but we can do the movie." He finally said, smiling down at her. He just couldn't say no to this girl. "But no chick flicks Trish...No chick flicks..."  
  
"Chick Flicks? Come on Chris...would I do that to you?" She smiled slyly.  
  
"Trish...our last "movie marathon" you made me watch Beaches, Terms of Endearment AND Steel Magnolias...I was ready to jump off of the damn balcony."  
  
"Oh come on...it wasn't that bad...besides you said you wanted to watch some dark death movies."  
  
"Dark death movies? I said I wanted some action movies with maybe a bit of violence...I was thinking Die Hard." Chris said incredulously.  
  
"Alright alright...how about Moulin Rouge?"  
  
"Moulin Rouge? What's that about?"  
  
"It's cool Chris...it's about umm..." Trish grinned guardedly, "this guy who meets this girl...then he kills all these people, especially the duke. It's a romance and an action movie."  
  
"Alright alright...Come on." Chris said resignedly.  
  
"Awesome, give me your bag." Trish said happily as she ran up ahead of him to the elevator. Chris walked slowly behind her. This was going to be harder than he thought.  
  
**** alright kids..I see the number reviews, THANKS...but I can't read them cause something's weird in fanfiction.net ----so all you Jeff/Trish shippers who may or may not be commenting on this....are probably disappointed with another Chris chapter but he's all in my head you know...and while I certainly can't complain I feel bad that some people may not be liking the stuff going on...so if you wanna tell me how you feel ya'll are going to have to email it to me: luvsdahardyz@hotmail.com --- seriously I really do love the Hardys! If you want a Trish/Jeff story fix, I actually have two in fanfiction.net already (The Lucky One, and Praying for Daylight) so go check those out... 


	4. Broken Table

Part 4  
  
Chris sat in the locker room by himself. How was he going to do this? He knew that Trish thought of him as one of her best friends, but he couldn't be around her right now...The night before had been a virtual hell. She had fallen asleep on the bed next to him and it was all he could do not to kiss her and tell her how he felt. But he couldn't do that...could he???  
  
Adam walked into the locker room and frowned slightly. Chris was staring into space vacantly. Which was completely unlike him. He slammed the door...and still no reaction.  
  
"YO!" He yelled.  
  
"What? Oh...sorry man, didn't see you there." Chris shook his head as though attempting to forget something.  
  
"Why so glum chum?" Adam said smilingly. Here we go....Chris was going kill him for that comment.  
  
Chris looked at him blankly. "What do you mean?" He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.  
  
Adam looked at him suspiciously. "Alright spill it Chris...I know something's wrong. I just said, "Why so glum chum", which on a regular basis would be something that YOU would crucify me for....It's Trish isn't it?" Adam asked astutely.  
  
"No..." Chris looked up and saw Adam roll his eyes, "All right...it's Trish and this Jeff thing...I can't stand it."  
  
"Well...You're going to have to stand it. Trish really likes him." Adam shrugged. "You're just going to have to let her go."  
  
"But what if I can't? In fact I know I can't. Last night Trish was all being friendly with me and stuff and we stayed up watching another one of her stupid chick flicks, and I just...you know...she makes me happy whenever she's around and hell I know the feelings I have for her go way beyond friendship. I don't know if I can restrain myself around her ya know." Chris leaned back against the wall dejectedly.  
  
"Well," Adam said hesitantly, "You could always just...tell her how you feel."  
  
"Are you insane? I can't do that. She's with Jeff now. What kind of an asshole would that make me?"  
  
"Well...if you can't stand to be around "it", then you can't be around her. It's either one or the other Chris. If you decide you're going to stop talking to her though, you better come up with a damn good reason."  
  
"Damn WCW for shutting down." Chris muttered as he stuck his feet in his wrestling boots.  
  
"Yeah like you would ever go back to their bullshit."  
  
Chris remained silent as he once again put his head in his hands. "Damn it Adam, what the hell am I going to do?"  
  
"I don't know man...but for all it's worth...I wished that you and her would have gotten together." Adam said seriously.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Well you know, Jeff like just broke up with Beth. I don't want Trish to be a rebound girl. She deserves better than that. And I know Jeff's a good guy, but...you know, he's been all about Beth for three years, now all of a sudden, he's all ready to date after a month. It's just not adding up in my head. But you...you I know really does like her. It's just too bad you know."  
  
"Yeah, I took too damn long. But hey...I mean who's to say that she would have liked me anyways right?" Chris said hopefully.  
  
"I don't know Chris. I mean she likes you a LOT as a friend. You're not disfigured...for all we know she may very well have liked you." Adam retorted.  
  
"Did she say anything to you?" Chris asked suspiciously.  
  
"Well...I know a few months back she asked me if you were seeing anyone. I don't know if she was going to set you up with someone or if she was asking for herself. I told her you weren't...and then you guys became friends so I don't really know...but..." Adam shrugged.  
  
"I know I know...it's too late. I need to go for a walk." Chris grabbed a shirt and walked out the door.  
  
Down the Hallway:  
  
Trish stood by a television monitor alone watching the match between Amy and Nora. She couldn't wait until she could wrestle as well as either of them.  
  
"Hey gorgeous."  
  
Trish jumped when she heard him whisper in her ear.  
  
"Jeff! God...don't do that...freaked me out..." She stuttered as he wrapped his arms around her from behind and gave her a hug. She still wasn't quite sure how to act around him. But this attention definitely wasn't going to be hard to get used to.  
  
"What if I do this?" He kissed her neck softly, and she felt her heart rate double.  
  
"Oh...I'd say you can definitely do that." She said turning around. God he was so amazingly beautiful.  
  
"I'm really looking forward to tonight Trish." He said as he tucked a stray hair behind his ear.  
  
"Me too. But umm...don't you have a match now?"  
  
"Yeah...shit I do. Ah well...See you later?"  
  
"Definitely. I'll meet you outside the locker rooms."  
  
He leaned down and kissed her softly then turned around when a sudden noise rang out through the hallway. They both turned around but no one was there...just a fallen table...broken in half.  
  
***Right...so this deciding between Jeff/Trish and Chris/Trish is getting tough...I think I'll just keep writing and see what comes to me...welcome to the love triangle... 


	5. Blood and Lies

Chapter 5  
  
Chris had been walking around the bend in the hallway when he saw Jeff and Trish kissing. He didn't even know what he was doing, but somehow he had slammed his fist down on the table next to him hard enough to break it. He looked down at his hand, and was surprised when he saw the blood dripping down his arm.  
  
"Fuck!" He yelped as he walked quickly back to the locker room, attempting to stem the flow of the blood from his hand before it fell to the floor of the hallway. As he walked into the locker room, Adam and Jay who had been standing by the door jumped and balked at the sight of the dripping blood from his hand.  
  
"What the hell happened to you?" Jay yelped.  
  
"Nothing...make yourself useful and hand me a towel would you." Chris scowled.  
  
"Here man...Jesus...what the fuck are you doing?" Adam asked as he asked watched Chris wrap his hands in the towel. "Nothing...I didn't do anything. It was an accident." Chris said absentmindedly.  
  
"What was an accident?"  
  
"Me breaking the table in the hallway..." Chris sighed as he muttered under his breath.  
  
"You broke the table? Why?" Jay asked in disbelief.  
  
Adam raised an eyebrow and look down at his friend.  
  
"You saw Trish and Jeff in the hallway didn't you." Adam declared.  
  
Chris didn't respond, but the glare he shot at Adam said more than words ever could.  
  
Jay looked back and forth between them.  
  
"You? And Trish?" He asked in amazement.  
  
"No! There is no me and Trish." Chris mumbled.  
  
"But he likes her and Trish and Jeff are going out tonight." Adam stated flatly.  
  
"Oh man...that sucks Chris."  
  
"Doesn't it just?" Chris said mockingly.  
  
The all looked up when a knock came on the door.  
  
"Come..." Adam began, then stopped when Chris shook his head roughly. "Just a sec! Who is it?" He continued.  
  
"It's Trish. Someone's bleeding down this hallway, I was just wondering if whoever it was...is okay?" Trish said through the door.  
  
"Um..." Adam bit his lip and looked pointedly at Chris.  
  
"Can I come in?" She asked again.  
  
"Ah...sure...sure." Chris said, grabbing a shirt from one of the lockers and placing it over his hand.  
  
"Hey guys...so who was it?" Trish said as she walked in the door. "They did quite a number on that table." She frowned suddenly when looked down on the floor and then stared at Chris.  
  
"Erm..." Chris looked down on the floor and saw the trail of blood leading up to him. "Thanks a lot guys." He muttered. Adam and Jay shrugged and walked out the door.  
  
"Chris? It was you? Are you okay?" Trish asked concernedly as she walked up to him and pulled the tshirt and towel away. She started cleaning the wound and tried to see how big it was. "What the hell were you thinking?"  
  
"Um...it was an accident."  
  
"An accident?" She began dubiously, "Your hand accidentally slammed on the table and broke it?"  
  
"Yeah." He looked at her hair as she looked down at his hand. He kind of liked the concern she was showing. In fact...maybe he liked it a little too much. He swallowed hard as a shot of unexpected heat shot through him...he shifted uncomfortably in his seat.  
  
"It's fine...it's fine." He muttered, pulling away from her, and walking towards the opposite side of the room.  
  
"No it's not...I think you're going to need stitches. Let me see it again."  
  
"No!" He almost shouted. "I mean no...it's okay...I'll be fine." He muttered.  
  
"What...Why are you acting weird? And what's with the table?" She looked at him confoundedly.  
  
"I...I..." He stammered, "Well...I was uh walking..." He paused. Alright...what can I say here that won't make me look like some insane jealous psychopath. He said inside his head. He couldn't think of anything and she was staring at him so damn intently it was freaking him out.  
  
"You were walking and you???" She continued, looking at him expectantly.  
  
"I'm pissed off cause...my girlfriend's cheating on me." He said quickly. He looked away suddenly. What the fuck? My girlfriend? This was never going to fly. He thought to himself.  
  
"Your...girlfriend? I didn't know you had a girlfriend." She frowned at this new information.  
  
"My ex-girlfriend really...we actually broke up a while ago but we were going to start again." What the hell am I saying? Stop lying asshole...stop lying. He thought inwardly, but the lies were easier than telling the truth. So he kept going. "You know, I just got off the phone with her and she told me she didn't want to be with me."  
  
"Are you serious? Oh god...Chris why didn't you tell me? This is awful." She said sympathetically, placing a concerned hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Yeah well, what are you going to do?" He said in relief as he shrugged. She was buying...she was actually buying it.  
  
"I mean...what the hell is wrong with her? You're a great guy...I mean you're nice and funny and smart and you're hot! Is she insane?" Trish rambled. "I mean who the hell does she think she is? You would be an amazing boyfriend. I can't even...the fact that she..." She stopped suddenly when the door to the locker room opened.  
  
"Hey Trish, Adam and Jay said you were..." Jeff stopped abruptly when he saw Trish and Chris standing together in the room.  
  
"Hey Jeff...Oh...your match is over." Trish said rather guiltily, she had just been rambling on accolades for Chris when she was supposed to be meeting another guy.  
  
"Um...yeah...is everything okay?" He looked at the blood-covered towel on Chris's hand, "Dude what the hell happened to your hand?"  
  
"Erm..." Chris began. He had been shocked when Trish had started going on about how great he was. He never actually thought he was boyfriend- worthy...after all he had been attempting to flirt with HER for a year now and NOTHING had ever come out of it...now she was telling him that he was funny and smart and good-looking...he was going to be in cloud nine for the rest of the night! Then he remembered why Jeff had come looking for her and his thoughts darkened.  
  
"Nothing...just got pissed off about something. I should go....I mean you guys should go. Have a great night." He stumbled on a bag on the floor, but kept right on going...leaving Trish and Jeff alone in the room.  
  
"Wait...Chris..." Trish started but he was already out of the door. She stared after him as the door to the locker room swung closed.  
  
Jeff looked concernedly at the crushed expression on Trish's face. He frowned slightly.  
  
"Are you okay Trish?"  
  
"Yeah...oh Jeff...I'm so sorry...it's just Chris had some really bad news tonight and I feel awful for him. I didn't know about his girlfriend." She said distractedly.  
  
"Girlfriend?" Jeff asked curiously.  
  
"Ex-girlfriend or something. He got pissed and broke that table down the hallway. Remember? The broken table?"  
  
"Uh huh...I do." Jeff replied. Then he remembered what they had been doing at the precise moment when the table had broken. Oh now he knew exactly what happened. "Ex-girlfriend huh...that sucks for him."  
  
"Yeah. He never said anything about her...it's just—weird."  
  
Poor Chris. Jeff thought to himself, but at least he wasn't doing anything to screw things up between him and Trish.  
  
"So umm...are you ready to go?" He asked.  
  
"Oh yeah, our date." Trish smiled at him awkwardly, "Let me go get my bag."  
  
"Okay, I'll wait for you outside." Jeff said, leaning down quickly to kiss her softly on the lips. Trish had that dreamy expression back on her face.  
  
"All right...see you in a bit." She said smiling up at him. She was still worried about Chris...but this date...she couldn't let anything spoil this date. As she bent down to get her bags, an image of the sad expression on Chris's face when he walked out of the locker room door popped up in her head and she frowned. Chris will be fine...but why do I feel this sudden urge to cancel this date?  
  
***Don't worry jeff/trish peoples....it's just beginning...THE DATE is up next 


	6. Fiirst Date

Chapter 6  
  
Trish looked one last time at her reflection in the mirror of the locker room. She was wearing a black boatneck top and black pants.  
  
"Aims?" She said, silently asking her friend for her opinion. Amy looked up from her packing and looked at Trish critically.  
  
"It's good babe...not too booby, but definitely leaves him wanting more." Amy said bluntly.  
  
"Gee thanks for the booby commentary." Trish said giggling, "But okay...so this looks good?"  
  
"Yes! You look hot girly! And I don't even know why you even bother trying. Jeff likes you...he really does."  
  
"I know but...I mean this is our first date. I just want it to be perfect ya know. He already walked in on me holding Chris's hand. I don't want him to think I'm just playing around with him." Trish said as she picked at a piece of lint on her shirt.  
  
Amy looked up at her and frowned. "Back up there Sparky...you were holding Chris's hand?"  
  
"Huh?" Trish said distractedly, "Oh well he had this huge cut on it and I was trying to clean it a bit for him. Then he told me about some ex- girlfriend of his and I was trying to comfort him."  
  
"Ex-Girlfriend? Chris doesn't have an...." Amy began, but a knock on the door interrupted her.  
  
"Oh crap that's Jeff. I better run, don't wanna keep him waiting. Later Aims." Trish said hurriedly as she grabbed her bags and walked out the door.  
  
Amy heard her say, "I'm ready", then listened to the fading footsteps. She smiled. She was really happy for Trish and Jeff. They deserved each other. Her thoughts however led back to Chris and she sat on the bench and frowned. Chris doesn't have an ex-girlfriend...unless it was someone from way back. She thought to herself silently. What was that about? She looked up again when another knock came on the door.  
  
"Come in." She said as she zipped up her last bag. Adam poked his head in the door.  
  
"Yo Lil' Ita..." He said smiling widely at her.  
  
"Ha ha," Amy said rolling her eyes, "You're corny Gums. What's up?"  
  
"Erm, Jay and I are heading out to dinner. Just wanted to know if you wanted to come. Matt's not here right?"  
  
"Yeah, he's at home. His shoulders are acting up again. I'm definitely up for some food though." Amy replied as she stood up and gathered her bags.  
  
"Good, cause I need to talk to you about this Jeff and Trish thing." Adam said, his usual happy grin replaced by a serious expression.  
  
"Huh? What about them?" Amy said as she followed him out of the locker room and into the hallway.  
  
"You mean you don't know?" Adam asked incredulously.  
  
"Don't know what?" Amy said inquiringly.  
  
"Oh man...I don't know if I should tell you." Adam said uncomfortably. He started fidgeting with the buttons on his shirt as he avoided her questioning eyes.  
  
"Oh come on. I'm not going to tell anyone." Amy said indignantly. "What's the deal?" She asked curiously.  
  
"Ah...I think you should be sitting for this." Adam said quietly, he looked around the hallway and made sure no one was listening.  
  
"Dude...what's the problem?" Amy said now worried the something horrible was going on.  
  
"Oh man...It's Chris." Adam finally said. "But we can't talk here. Let's go to the restaurant and have it out."  
  
Meanwhile, in Jeff's Car...  
  
"So...where are we going?" Trish asked inquisitively.  
  
"A place called Fio's. I looked it up on Zagat's. It's supposedly really good Italian food." Jeff said smiling at her.  
  
"Sounds fancy. Are you sure I'm dressed properly?" Trish asked. Jeff had put on a pair of clean khakis and a button down shirt. He looked ridiculously good-looking when he was all dressed up like that.  
  
"You'll be fine. You always look amazing to me." Jeff said quietly.  
  
"Aw..." Trish said, blushing slightly at the compliment.  
  
Jeff looked at her and feigned shock. "Are you blushing? Whoa...Trish Stratus? A blusher? Who would have thought it?"  
  
"Shut up!" Trish said, laughing along with him.  
  
"Seriously though, you look great." Jeff said earnestly, "So good I'm kinda having trouble remembering the turns for this restaurant."  
  
"Oh stop it." Trish said, she blushed even deeper and looked away when Jeff laughed again after seeing her cheeks turn a deeper shade of red.  
  
As he parked the car, he reached over and touched her cheek, his hands felt cool against her warm cheek.  
  
"You're adorable." He said softly before leaning over and kissing her softly on the lips.  
  
"And you...." Trish said quietly against his lips, "are going to have to stop kissing me." She laughed at the shocked expression on his face when he pulled away. "At least feed me first!"  
  
Jeff laughed loudly. "And after I feed you? How many kisses can I have?"  
  
"We'll see how dinner goes buddy boy." Trish said slyly.  
  
Jeff got out of the car and opened her car door. He took her hand in his as they walked towards the entrance of the restaurant.  
  
"Do I get anything for my gentlemanly conduct?" He asked coyly as he pulled out the chair for her at the table.  
  
As he sat across the table from her, Trish smiled. She leaned over and kissed him softly on the cheek.  
  
"Well...it looks like I'm going to have to order expensive champagne tonight. If a kiss on the cheek is gentlemanly behavior, a kiss on the lips is going to be pretty hard to get."  
  
"Oh you have no idea." Trish said flirtatiously.  
  
Dinner consisted of comfortable conversation between as they discussed their different likes and dislikes. Trish was lost in those green pools of color in his eyes. All thoughts of Chris flew to the back of her mind as she lost herself in thoughts of the man sitting in front of her.  
  
Back to Adam, Jay and Amy @ another restaurant:  
  
"Are you serious? Chris likes Trish????" Amy asked in amazement.  
  
"Yep, actually he's kinda in love with her." Adam said directly.  
  
"What the...but what about Jeff?"  
  
"I know, Trish is crazy about Jeff and Chris won't ruin that for her."  
  
"But...oh man." Amy said speechlessly.  
  
"Yep...this is going to be interesting."  
  
**The Friends now know! Whose side will they take? ALRIGHTY KIDS...SOME JEFF AND TRISH flirtations....next up...another angst from Chris...and after the date continues... 


	7. Can't be with you

Part 7  
  
"So anyways, what do you think?" Adam asked expectantly. Jay nodded in agreement as they both stared at Amy.  
  
"Oh man, I don't know you guys, I mean I know Jeff likes Trish. He's definitely attracted to her at the very least and I mean come on, Trish has a great personality. But, you're also right Adam, in that Jeff really has JUST gotten out of a long term relationship and I know that he's still really close to Beth. And Chris, if what you're saying is true, is already in love with Trish and...oh Christ, I don't know." Amy threw her hands up in the air in frustration. They had been sitting in the restaurant for over an hour discussing the love triangle between their friends.  
  
"Has Trish ever expressed any interest in Chris?" Jay asked suddenly.  
  
"What do you mean? Like as a boyfriend?" Amy inquired curiously.  
  
"Well yeah, I mean, cause if she has a thing for Chris too then this whole thing can get even more complicated." "Well," Amy looked at the two of them and fiddled with her napkin awkwardly, "I don't know if I can tell you this..."  
  
"Oh come on Amy, I wasn't supposed to tell you about Chris either!" Adam said indignantly.  
  
"Ok ok, relax. Well, yes...Trish had a sorta crush on him a couple of months ago. But then they became really good friends and she told me that she didn't want to risk that friendship cause she likes him so much. But she definitely was attracted to him..." Amy paused as Adam interjected suddenly.  
  
"She had a crush on him??? And she never told me?? Well I just...oh shit! Chris!" Adam said straightening up in his seat abruptly.  
  
"I thought I saw you guys through the window." Chris said sullenly. "Mind if I join you? I'm starving."  
  
"Sure. Move over Aims." Jay said.  
  
Chris nodded at Amy as he sat down.  
  
"Hey Buddy," Amy said quietly, but she couldn't quite disguise the sympathy in her voice. She looked up guiltily when Adam kicked her under the table.  
  
Chris looked at Adam suspiciously, then shook his head. "You told her didn't you." He stated flatly.  
  
"Umm.." Adam glared at Amy, then looked back at Chris, "Listen man, I was just..."  
  
"No! Damn it Adam. Look Aims, I know Jeff's one of your best friends, so don't worry about it ok! I'm going to get over this."  
  
Amy looked down at her food then said, "Chris, you're my friend too. And honestly, even if Jeff and Trish are dating, it doesn't mean that...you should hide your feelings the way that you have been. I think you should tell her before she gets too deeply involved in this relationship." Amy patted him on the shoulder comfortingly.  
  
Chris shook his head and all of a sudden got up from the table. "I can't sit here with you guys. Look, I'm going to handle this my own way, and I'd appreciate it, if the three of you just forget all about how I feel about her. And Aims, please don't tell Jeff." He turned and began to walk away.  
  
"Wait Chris!" Adam protested.  
  
"Seriously, just forget it." Chris said resolutely before walking out of the door.  
  
"Oh no," Amy said sadly. "Well...we fucked this one up." Jay murmured.  
  
Adam shook his head as he looked at his friends. "What the hell are we going to do?"  
  
"Nothing. You heard him. He wants us to forget about it. If we try to pull anything, it'll only make this worse." Jay declared.  
  
"Yeah Adam, we're just going to have to wait and see. Besides, we're all friends with Jeff and Trish and if it works out for them, we're all going to have to deal with it." Amy rationalized.  
  
"But man, what about Chris?" Adam asked. Neither Amy nor Jay answered him.  
  
Meanwhile, Chris walked out into the warm summer night and hurried to his car. He couldn't stay mad at his friends; he knew that they were only trying to help. It only irritated him that they even discussed the notion of him and Trish together since it made it seem like he even had a chance. The hard rock music playing in his stereo was unbearable and he quickly began changing stations as he pulled onto the highway. A good long drive was all he needed to calm him down.  
  
BACK TO The Date: Jeff gently took Trish's hands in his as they walked into the hotel that had been booked for the wrestlers. Dinner had been about 3 hours of comfortable discussion and he felt like he was really getting to know her.  
  
"So,I guess I'm not really supposed to ask this." He said, breaking the silence.  
  
"What?" She asked, staring up at him inquisitively.  
  
"Well, what did you think? Do you wanna go out again sometime?" Jeff uncertainly.  
  
Trish smiled. He was so adorable when he wasn't sure of what he was saying. "Of course. I had a great time Jeff."  
  
"Really? I'm so glad. I just...ya know sometimes you can't tell if...well ya know." They stopped walking when they got to the door to her room.  
  
"I know. But I did have a great time. And I would definitely like to do this again sometime." Trish said, placing a hand on his cheek.  
  
Jeff covered her hands with his as he leaned down to kiss her on the lips, softly at first, before gradually deepening the kiss. His tongue swept inside of her mouth, gently sweeping, rubbing against hers. She moaned softly, and then he slowly pulled away, kissing the corner of her mouth, then her forehead.  
  
"Sweet dreams Trish." He said quietly against her lips.  
  
"Good Night." She still had her eyes closed and he smiled and shook his head, she was just so sweet.  
  
He hugged her tightly, then said, "I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
She waved at him as he walked towards his own room. She opened the door to her room and was surprised to see that Amy still wasn't inside.  
  
"Hmm..." She thought curiously. "I wonder where she is?"  
  
She grabbed her cell phone from her bag and tried to think of whom she should call first...  
  
"Ooh Chris! Besides I have to talk to him about this bitch ex-girlfriend..." she mumbled to herself as she dialed his cell number. Meanwhile Chris had just walked into the lobby and was headed towards his room when his cell phone went off.  
  
"Oh Christ," He muttered, it was Trish. It could only mean one thing...and the acknowledgment of this date between her and Jeff sent a pain in his heart that he simply couldn't control. But he also knew that he would have to pick up his phone, because he could never deny her anything. And if she needed him...he would always be there. He took a deep breath and pasted a smile on his face, willing the phony happiness to be echo in his voice.  
  
"Hey sweetie." He said as he walked towards the elevator.  
  
"Chris! I'm so glad you picked up! Where are you?" Trish said happily and naively...not knowing the pain she was causing the receiver of the call.  
  
"Erm...I was just on my way up to my room. What's up?" Chris bit back his questions about the date. He simply wasn't sure if he could handle anything more tonight.  
  
"Well, I just got back from my date. I was just wondering if you felt like hanging out. I wanted to talk to you about this thing with your ex- girlfriend too." Trish said concernedly. The tone of his voice, sounded falsely cheerful and she believe that it was all due to the ex girlfriend.  
  
"Oh...well I don't know...I mean..." Chris mumbled in his cell phone trying to think of an acceptable excuse for not having to go up to her room.  
  
"Aw come on Chris. I've barely seen you all day. Come on up, Amy's not here...we can just talk and listen to music or whatever." Trish said earnestly.  
  
Chris sighed quietly. "All...All right...I'll be there in a bit."  
  
"I'll be waiting."  
  
Back at the restaurant:  
  
"So what are we going to do?" Jay asked again suddenly, they had been sitting in the restaurant for several hours now. The conversation had remained mainly on the issue of this unexpected love triangle between their friends, but no one had as of yet made any clear decisions on what should be done.  
  
Amy stared at him blankly. "What do you mean? I thought we just discussed this. There's nothing to do. Jeff and Trish...they have a right to figure each other out and decide for themselves what they want. And Chris...I think we all know that Chris is too nice to ever be an asshole about this and break them up. We're just going to have to lay low and let whatever happens...happen."  
  
Adam slowly nodded halfheartedly. "Yeah, she's right Jay. Nothing to do here but wait it out...damn...I just feel so damn bad for Chris ya know."  
  
"I know man...it's just too fucking bad." Jay shrugged helplessly.  
  
HOTEL ROOM:  
  
"Okay, so tell me once and for all...who is this girl?" Trish asked as she placed a c.d in the stereo inside the armoire of the hotel room.  
  
"She's my ex-girlfriend Jessica," Chris said slowly, avoiding her eyes as she stared at him. Well at least that was the truth, he did once have a girlfriend named Jessica...but he hadn't thought about her since he dumped her when he realized he had been falling for Trish.  
  
"Jessica? I don't think I've ever met her..." Trish said as she sat down on the bed beside him. She stared up at him expectantly, waiting for him to elaborate on the relationship.  
  
Chris turned away slightly and then tried to change the subject. "Hey, what's this you're playing?"  
  
"Oh umm," Trish said distractedly, "It's Sarah McLachlan. It's a mix my friend made for me a while back."  
  
Chris sat silently and as he listened to the words of the music, he felt a sudden shiver pass through him. He had never been one for the type of music Trish listened to, but the words of the music evoked sudden emotion from him that he couldn't hide.  
  
---What ravages of spirit  
  
conjured this temptuous rage,  
  
created you a monster,  
  
broken by the rule of love?  
  
And fate has led you through it.  
  
You do what you have to do.  
  
And fate has led you through it.  
  
You do what you have to do.  
  
And I have the sense to recognize  
  
that I don't know how to let you go.  
  
--------  
  
He turned around slowly and stared into Trish's eyes.  
  
"I don't know how to let her go..." He said slowly, he knew she thought that he was talking about Jessica, but in reality...he meant her. Trish silently stared back at him sadly, willing him to continue, not knowing that she was wrenching the very confession of a heartbroken man.  
  
---Every moment marked  
  
with apparitions of your soul.  
  
I'm ever swiftly moving,  
  
trying to escape this desire,  
  
the yearning to be near you.  
  
I do what I have to do.  
  
The yearning to be near you.  
  
I do what I have to do.  
  
--------  
  
The melancholy notes echoed through the silent room, the heart wrenching words ripping through Chris's senses.  
  
"I feel like I need to be with her...all the time. I know that...that she doesn't know how I feel, but I can't help it. I love her...and I need her." Chris looked away suddenly, unable to meet the sympathetic eyes that looked at him.  
  
"Oh Chris," Trish said quietly, she could feel the sadness coming from Chris...and it hurt her to know that he was in such pain.  
  
---- I have the sense to recognize  
  
that I don't know how to let you go.  
  
I don't know how to let you go.  
  
------------  
  
"She's so much a part of me...she's the best part of me." Chris continued, "I don't know how to tell her...or make her realize that she's the most important thing in my life. I'm half a man without her. And the worst thing is...she cares about someone else. And it's killing me to know that I'm not that man and I can't ever tell her how I feel."  
  
"But Chris," Trish began, but he held his hand up to silence her.  
  
"Just let me say all of this ok?" He said quietly, and she nodded silently, concern etched across her features.  
  
---A glowing ember, burning hot,  
  
AND burning slow.  
  
Deep within, I'm shaken by the violence  
  
of existing for only you.  
  
-----  
  
"It scares me that I can feel this strongly about a person without having any validation of her feelings for me. But really, it doesn't matter you know?" Chris shook his head before Trish could say a word, "It doesn't matter how she feels about me because no matter how she does feel, it doesn't lessen this love that I feel." He touched his heart, emphasizing the feelings that he couldn't even put into words.  
  
"I know that she's everything that I'm looking for and that I've dreamed about for so long. I'm a better man for even having her in my life."  
  
------  
  
I know I can't be with you.  
  
I do what I have to do.  
  
I know I can't be with you.  
  
I do what I have to do.  
  
--------  
  
"Now that she's with someone, I feel trapped. Because I love her so much...and her happiness is what's really important to me. And if this man," He swallowed hard, as though he was forcing the words out of his mouth, "if this man, is what will make her happy, then I will stand by and let him have her. It's killing me...deep down inside, it's tearing me apart, but if he's the one that'll make her smile...well then he...he deserves her." He closed his eyes; unable to continue now...Trish was shocked when she saw a single tear roll down his cheek.  
  
---And I have the sense to recognize  
  
But I don't know how to let you go.  
  
I don't know how to let you go.  
  
I don't know how to let you go.---  
  
"Oh sweetie," She said quietly, reaching and holding on to his hand as he struggled to control his emotions. She hadn't expected this at all...and the sight of Chris, usually so composed, breaking down in front of her broke her heart.  
  
"I'll do it all...I'll be there for her, even though she has no idea how much it hurts me. I'll listen to her talk about how great he is...and I won't say a word about how I feel. I'll always be there for her." Chris whispered finally as the final notes of the song echoed through the quiet room.  
  
"Chris...I..." Trish began, but he stood up abruptly.  
  
"I have to go." He said softly. "Thanks for listening." He smiled down at her as he reached over and touched her face softly, his fingers barely grazing her skin. She gasped softly as she stared up him, his eyes so desolate and bleak that she couldn't speak, couldn't do anything...but watch helplessly as he turned around and walked out of the room.  
  
***This was a really hard chapter for me to write, a lot was pulled from personal experiences...so please let me know what you guys think. 


	8. Monster Ballad Montage

Chapter 8  
  
Amy frowned as she rummaged through her purse in search of the card for the hotel room. She was down the hallway towards her hotel room and she didn't know if Trish was back from her date yet.  
  
"Where the fuck...oomph." She looked up in surprise when she realized that Chris had just bumped into her. "Chris? Hey...are you okay." She yelled out when he merely steadied her and walked pass her without saying a word. He turned around, his face pale and haggard looking. He nodded silently then walked quickly away.  
  
She rushed towards the door to her room and knocked on the door.  
  
"Chris?" Trish said concernedly, "Oh hey Aims." She said distractedly when she realized who was outside.  
  
"Was Chris just here?" Amy frowned slightly, Trish looked troubled as she stepped away from the door to let Amy in.  
  
"Yeah...he...oh my God Amy." Trish said helplessly. "He was so upset, and I didn't know what to do and he wouldn't let me talk he just...God! The expression on his face just broke my heart."  
  
"What are you talking about Trish? Calm down." Amy rushed out as her friend began pacing the room.  
  
"He was just...well okay. I got home from my date and I asked him to come here cause I wanted to talk to him about his ex-girlfriend...and he just, poor thing, he's so in love with this girl. It just...it kills me to know that he's so sad. He's such a good guy and this heinous woman is breaking his heart."  
  
Amy's mouth dropped open. Holy shit. She thought to herself, as the story Trish was telling her along with the knowledge of Chris's feelings formed in her mind. "Trish," Amy began calmly, "Tell me exactly what he said."  
  
"Well...I asked him to talk about her and we were listening to one of my Sarah McLachlan cd's. He said her name was Jessica...you know the ex- girlfriend. And anyways, he heard a song from the c.d. and all of a sudden he just kind of let it all out. He was saying that he didn't know how to let her go and that she completed him and how he knows that she's with someone else but he loved her so much that he was willing to stand by and let her be with another guy because it made her happy."  
  
"Oh my god..." Amy whispered as Trish continued to talk. She knew then that Chris was talking about Trish. Knew that it was probably hurting him to even be around Trish. She stared at her friend as Trish continued to talk about all of the feelings Chris had revealed. She felt a strong desire to shake Trish and to tell her that Chris was really talking about her. But she knew that she couldn't.  
  
"Ummm...Trish." Amy interrupted. Trish looked back at her distractedly. "I'm sorry hun, I have to make a phone call."  
  
"Oh...ok." Trish said confusedly. "Go ahead."  
  
"Right...I'll be right back." Amy said as she ran out of the room and ran down the hallway.  
  
"Adam?" She said when he finally picked up.  
  
"Huh? What?" Adam mumbled his voice deep with sleep.  
  
"You have to go find Chris. He just told Trish everything...except he said he felt the way he did about some ex-girlfriend. I just saw him and god he looked like a mess. Please check on him." Amy pleaded worriedly.  
  
"Fuck. Are you serious? Thanks Aims." Adam said quickly and she heard the rustle of sheets before Adam hung up the phone.  
  
Amy turned around and walked back to the room with Trish and was surprised when as she reached for the door, it opened and practically bumped into Trish who had changed and was currently wearing her glasses, a sweats and flip flops. Trish immediately tried to get around her but Amy was quick to grab her arm.  
  
"Whoa hold up, where are you going?" Amy asked anxiously.  
  
"Look...I can't just sit here and go to bed. I have to find Chris. He's real upset right now and I feel awful for making him think about that horrible wretched woman. He needs a friend." Trish explained as she attempted to pull her arm away from Trish.  
  
"I don't think you should do that Trish." Amy said wryly. "He just needs to be alone."  
  
"What? No he doesn't. This was a probably a cry for help. You know...why else would he tell me all this stuff? He obviously wanted me to know and make him feel better. He was just overwhelmed." Trish said frowning at Amy when she still refused to let her go.  
  
"No Trish. Seriously, I just called Adam; he's going to look for him. He'll be fine. Besides...umm..." Amy grimaced as she tried to think of another reason why Trish shouldn't go to Chris, "oh! And he probably doesn't want to be around women right now. It'll be better if he has another guy to talk to."  
  
"Adam? Come on, I know Chris and I really think that..."  
  
"No Trish, just go to bed and forget about it. He's not ready to talk to you right now. Chris will come back to you when he's good and ready...I mean" Amy swallowed nervously when she realized what she had said.  
  
Trish leaned back and looked at her questioningly. "What do you mean by that?"  
  
"What are you talking about Trish?" Amy said awkwardly walking back into the room and away from her friend.  
  
"What you just said. That Chris'll come back to me? When he's good and ready? What do you mean? Where is he going?" Trish followed Amy as she walked around the to her bed, putting distance between the two of them.  
  
Amy shook her head, "I meant he'll come back to TALK to you when he's good and ready."  
  
"Why won't you look at me? Are you hiding something from me? And why won't you let me talk to him? Is there something going on here that I don't know about?" Trish couldn't help but notice the way that Amy fidgeted and looked all around the room awkwardly, doing everything possible avoid Trish's eyes.  
  
"Amy! What the hell is going on??" Trish yelled frustratedly.  
  
Meanwhile:  
  
Adam walked quickly to Chris's room. He tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes as he looked at the descending numbers on the doorways. He couldn't believe what Amy had just told him. Did Chris really expose himself in such a way to Trish?  
  
He knocked on the doorway, but there was no answer. He tried the door but it was locked. He ran his fingers through his hair aggravatingly when he realized that he had probably gone somewhere else. The lobby! Maybe they saw him walk through! He quickly turned around and ran down to the elevator.  
  
"Excuse me!" He said urgently as the concierge who had been dozing off in the front desk stood up in surprise.  
  
"OH sorry sir. Umm...How may I help you?" The man said awkwardly, bright red color climbing his cheeks.  
  
"Shit! How long have you been sleeping? Forget it..." Adam said waving off the man's explanation for his errant behavior, "Have you seen a blonde dude, about 6 foot, long hair, one of the wrestlers?"  
  
"Ah...no sir. I'm sorry."  
  
"Shit!" Adam muttered through his teeth. There was no way of knowing where Chris could be now. He could be down the street at any of the random bars by now. Adam slowly walked back to the elevator but paused when he heard the ending notes of November Rain by Guns and Roses emanating from the Hotel Bar in the corner of the lobby. He shook his head, started walking again but then heard the familiar first notes of the White Snake song, "Here I Go Again On My Own" that Chris had so often forced him to listen to in the drives to Florida.  
  
He couldn't help but smile wryly as he turned and began to walk towards the bar. November Rain and Here I Go Again On My Own? It was like a soundtrack of Chris' life. He signed when he saw his friends' familiar profile as he sat with his head in one hand and a beer in the other in the corner of the nearly empty room. He was seated close to the jukebox and in front of him was a small stack of quarters.  
  
Chris didn't look up when Adam walked over to him. He sighed and simply said, "Amy?"  
  
"Yeah she called me." Adam said honestly, sitting down next to Chris. He motioned for another beer at the waitress then waited for Chris to continue talking.  
  
"How did you know I was here?" Chris asked quietly as tapped his fingers to the beat of the music.  
  
"Well I went to your room and you weren't there. Then I came down here and heard November Rain followed closely by your favorite song ever in life and figured...who else would be listening to that depressing shit? And the answer to that was you my friend." Adam nodded at the waitress as she placed the beer in front of him. He watched his friend carefully in silence, willing him to talk.  
  
Chris shrugged. As the song ended he dropped another quarter in the slot and pressed a couple of buttons, Adam looked at the old Juke Box and read the title, "When I Look Into Your Eyes" by Firehouse.  
  
Adam sighed resignedly. This was going to be harder than he'd realize. Chris was now playing with the quarters on the table still resolutely avoiding looking at him. Minutes passed and they sat quietly listening to the lyrics of the song Chris had played.  
  
I see forever when I look in your eyes  
  
You're all I ever wanted  
  
I always want you to be mine  
  
Let's make a promise till the end of time  
  
We'll always be together  
  
And our love will never die  
  
So here we are face to face  
  
And heart to heart  
  
I want you to know we will  
  
Never be apart  
  
Now I believe that wishes can come true  
  
Cause I see my whole world  
  
I see only you  
  
When I look into your eyes  
  
I can see how much I love you  
  
And it makes me realize  
  
When I look into your eyes  
  
I see all my dreams come true  
  
When I look into your eyes  
  
I've looked for you all of my life  
  
Now that I've found you  
  
We will never say goodbye  
  
I can't stop this feeling  
  
There's nothing I can do  
  
'Cause I see everything when I look at you  
  
As the last notes of the song faded away, Chris leaned forward to once again pick up a quarter but Adam blocked his hand, quickly grabbing the remaining quarters and pocketing them. Chris raised his eyebrows questioningly.  
  
"Come on Chris. Talk to me." Adam said worriedly. "I'm not going to let you listen to anymore of this crap music until you do."  
  
"Fuck off Adam all right. Just leave me alone." Chris said throwing a couple of bills on the table as he rose swiftly.  
  
"Hold up hold up. Here all right. Here are your quarters. Go ahead plan another one of your "I want to commit suicide songs", but stay down here and talk to me man. Look, I'm sorry I slipped and told Amy but honestly I was only thinking of you. I was just trying to figure out how deep this thing with Jeff really goes." Adam rushed out before he could leave the bar.  
  
Chris ran his fingers through his hair and looked at his friend tiredly. He shook his head and sighed, grabbed a quarter from the table and deposited it in the slot, this time choosing "Don't Cry" by Guns and Roses.  
  
"Well..." He began, "What did Amy say?"  
  
"It's deep. She likes him a lot." Adam said seriously.  
  
"Yeah well, nothing I didn't know before." Chris responded dejectedly leaning back against the back of the booth.  
  
"But Chris, she likes you too. Honestly, I think he just beat you to the punch. She likes both of you." Adam sighed wearily. Chris shrugged at that and raised his hand up in the air to order another beer.  
  
"What happened tonight?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Amy said she saw you leave their room looking all peaked and what not. Said something about you telling Trish, but that you lied and said it was about some ex-girlfriend." Adam explained with concern etched in his face.  
  
"She's got it right. This morning ya know, how I cut my hand and shit...well she was asking me why I did it and I couldn't of anything to say. So I lied and told her I was pissed off at my ex. She totally believed me and was asking me about her tonight. I was listening to some song she was playing and it was like all my thoughts put into music. I just exploded and told her everything. Only problem is...now she thinks I'm head over heels in love with my damn ex-girlfriend. It's pathetic." Chris finished, he took a long swig of beer and swiped the moisture from his lips. "Fuck! I want to tell her so damn badly, but I can't man."  
  
"Chris...what are you going to do?"  
  
"I have no fucking idea. All I know is...I have to stay away from her. This isn't right...what I'm doing I mean. I can't keep lying to her and there sure as hell is no way I can tell her the truth." Chris paused then suddenly raised his head and stared pointedly at Adam. "What would you do? If you were me?"  
  
Adam thought quietly for a moment then heaved a sigh of misery.  
  
"I don't know. I...I guess I would...I'd...I'd be where you are right now." He finally said.  
  
"I can't keep doing this." Chris shut his eyes, "It's fucking killing me...and it's only been their first date. What am I going to do the next time they go out? Or if they fucking start making out with each other in front of me? I can't do it man."  
  
Adam stared at his friend sadly and shook his head. There was no way this was going to end well.  
  
Unbeknownst to either of them, someone was sitting a few booths away from them, his most prominent feature covered with a dark hat. He shook his head. He knew that only he could fix this...but it would mean giving up the one source of happiness that he had found in his life.  
  
*** so...who wants to kill me? Don't worry...more to come soon if you review...REVIEWS GET ME THROUGH MY DAY KIDS...THEY SERIOUSLY DO! So make me happy...and I'll try my damndest to make you happy! ;-) 


	9. What to do?

"Amy," Trish said placing her hands on her hips, "What are you talking about?"  
  
Amy bit her lip. She couldn't say anything...but god she was just so tempted. Fuck, what can I say, what can I say, she said inside of her head as she looked at the signs of impatience on Trish's face.  
  
"See Trish, umm...well Jeff!" Amy shouted, yes! She knew what she could tell Trish and not technically be lying.  
  
Trish frowned at her friend.  
  
"No, we're not talking about Jeff, we're talking about Chris...remember?"  
  
"I mean, Jeff, like you and Jeff. You guys are basically together now and umm...Chris is feeling crappy about his relationship with this girl. I meant that's why he doesn't want to talk to you right now." Amy explained, relieved when the look of anger disappeared from Trish's face.  
  
"Me and Jeff? But, I mean we just started going out. I...I never even thought that it would bother him." Trish frowned, "He has been acting strange lately," She said as an afterthought.  
  
"Well, see! It's because of this...thing with the girl."  
  
"Oh, oh man, I'm such an insensitive bitch. I can't believe I never even considered that I would be hurting him." Trish said, sitting down sadly on the bed.  
  
Amy nodded slowly, "Umm...so how are things with you and Jeff." Now that Trish was rather distracted, at least maybe she could figure out if things between Jeff and Trish would go all right.  
  
"Oh you know, he's a sweetheart. I really like him. But poor Chris."  
  
"No, no, stop thinking about Chris. Focus on Jeff for now okay." Amy said quickly before Trish could change the subject, "Do you know where it's going with him?"  
  
"Huh?" Trish asked distractedly, "Oh well, I guess it could go somewhere. He's really sweet and gentlemanly when he's around me. He didn't even try to get into our room, he just kissed me outside the door."  
  
"Oh really. Well, that's good. So umm...hey are you okay?" Amy asked concernedly when she noticed the sadness in Trish's eyes.  
  
"I'm sorry Aims, I just...I'm still kinda thinking about Chris. I just feel terrible, I mean I can't believe I didn't even see this coming."  
  
"Well...yeah...how did you not see this coming?" Amy said, actually thinking about how Trish could not know or see that Chris was obviously in love with her.  
  
"Aims! Like I don't feel guilty enough."  
  
"Sorry." Amy mumbled awkwardly.  
  
"So well...does this mean that I have to stay away from Chris?" Trish bit her bottom lip nervously as Amy seemed to consider it.  
  
"Honestly?"  
  
"Honesty would be nice."  
  
"Then, I just think that you shouldn't mention Jeff so much around him. Well I mean mention Jeff, so he knows ya'll are still together...but don't talk about personal stuff."  
  
Trish nodded slowly. "Right."  
  
"Now can we please go to bed. I'm exhausted." Amy yawned hugely.  
  
"All right. Night Aims." Trish mumbled before climbing into bed.  
  
Meanwhile, Jeff walked up to his room. He sighed as he sat down on his bed. He felt terrible about the entire situation. He remember Adam saying that Trish had probably only chosen him because he had acted first. But was that all?  
  
He knew that they had a connection. Trish wasn't the usual kind of girl he went out with, but then there wasn't really anything "usual" about her. She looked like a girly kind of girl, and she could have so easily been just one of the many useless valets in the company, but she had not allowed herself to be piegeonholed in such a way. Instead she learned how to wrestle and was actually damn good at it now.  
  
He thought about Chris, one of his best...well was one of his best friends at work.... but now, it didn't seem like whatever friendship they had was going to be able to withstand him being with the girl that Chris seemed to be in love with. He tried to put himself in Chris's position. And with a sinking feeling in his stomach realized that...if Chris had gone out with Trish first he probably would have just stood aside because well, the truth was he wasn't in love with Trish. Sure, he could see himself somewhere down the line loving her, but that feeling of "wanna change my life for her" feeling that he had with his ex-girlfriend simply wasn't there.  
  
"Shit." He mumbled under his breath.  
  
But he also knew that the ever-present possibility of the relationship between him and Trish was also the one thing that was holding him back from the darkness that could so easily take over him. Wrestling wasn't cutting it anymore and he had known that for a long time. The break-up with his girlfriend would have probably been the straw that broke the camels back but before that had happened he realized that Trish, this beautiful girl that everyone wanted for some reason liked him. She really liked him.  
  
The guilt he felt gnawed at him. Was it really fair for him to hold on to her simply because it made him feel better? He really didn't know. She did like him and if he was to break things off with her he would hurt her and he certainly didn't want that. He sighed. Suddenly, his cell phone started to ring beside him on the bed.  
  
"Hello."  
  
"Jeff? It's Beth."  
  
*******wanna see reviews please...I've been stuck on this story for awhile now and I think I may have come up with something that I wanna follow through with....let's see the reaction folks 


	10. Too Many Guyswhat's a girl to do?

Jeff yawned widely as he entered the locker room. He looked around and was surprised to find that only Jay was inside, sitting in a corner lacing up his boots.  
  
"Jesus Christ Jeff..." Jay started. He was interrupted by another loud yawn from Jeff.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Well, I guess if I ever had any questions about what went on inside of your stomach, all of that was just answered."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
"I mean Christ! Could your mouth have been any wider???" Jay laughed as Jeff, who was extremely tired, didn't even have the energy to come up with a response.  
  
"Sorry, I'm just so fucking tired." Jeff rubbed the front of his face and started jumping around to wake himself up.  
  
"Umm...well considering I know from Amy that Trish was in bed fairly early last night...I'm not even sure if I want to know why you're so tired." Jay raised an eyebrow. Inside he thought, if the little fucker dropped off Trish in her hotel room then went and hooked up with some other girl...their match tonight was going to be stiff as hell.  
  
"Nah man. I was on the phone until real late." Jeff mumbled. Then he looked up and frowned at Jay. "What the hell are you insinuating Jay?"  
  
"Nothing nothing." Jay muttered, "So who were you on the phone with last night?"  
  
"Umm..." Jeff said hesitantly.  
  
"What?" Jay asked curiously.  
  
"Erm...I was ah...talking to umm..."  
  
"Spit it Jeff...come on." Jay said impatiently.  
  
Before Jeff could answer, they turned around when the door to the locker room opened once more and Chris, Adam, Steve, and Kurt walked in.  
  
Chris saw Jeff first, nodded slightly in acknowledgement and walked to the corner, unzipping his bag and started taking his things out.  
  
"Umm...don't worry about it." Jeff said quickly. Seeing Chris immediately made him feel guilty.  
  
"Don't worry about what?" Adam asked inquisitively.  
  
"Nothing. I have to go check on something." Jeff mumbled and quickly left the room.  
  
Steve and Kurt watched Jeff walk out the door, turned to look at Jay and Adam, then looked at Chris questioningly. They hadn't missed the palpable tension that had filled the room when Chris had walked in.  
  
"is something going on here?" Steve asked curiously.  
  
"What's wrong with you and Jeff?" Kurt added.  
  
"Don't worry about." Adam quickly said for Chris who was now standing silently in front of his locker with his back to them.  
  
Kurt and Steve shrugged and then started talking about gimmicks they were trying to bring up to Vince.  
  
Adam looked at Jay and mouthed, "What's going on with Jeff?"  
  
Jay shrugged and went back to lacing up his boots.  
  
**  
  
Jeff walked down the hallway in search of Trish. He still wasn't sure what he was feeling for her, but the amazing conversation he had with Beth the night before did nothing to soothe his troubled mind.  
  
They hadn't discussed their relationship at all. Rather, it was like the beginning of their relationship...when they had simply talked and talked for hours, just relaying anything and everything that came to mind. He had made one decision however. Even though he felt guilty about "taking away" Trish from Chris, he wasn't just going to give her up. If Chris told her how he felt and she chose Chris over him...then yes, he would step aside. But as long as he didn't...he simply couldn't think of a reason why he couldn't just be with her.  
  
"Jeff!"  
  
He turned around when he heard the person he had been searching for behind him.  
  
"Hey you!" Jeff grinned.  
  
"Where're you going?" Trish asked inquiringly.  
  
"Oh well, I was actually looking for you." Jeff smiled when Trish immediately looked away bashfully.  
  
"Why?" Trish asked.  
  
"Just cause...I like...looking at you."  
  
Trish laughed and rolled her eyes. "Nice line Jeff."  
  
"That was no line. I do like looking at you." Jeff laughed when Trish rolled her eyes again and flirtatiously pushed him away.  
  
"Shut up! You're always embarrassing me."  
  
"Yeah but I know you kinda like it." Jeff grinned.  
  
Trish smiled at that comment, not really knowing how to respond. It felt amazing to be standing here, flirting with him. And honestly, she still couldn't really believe that he liked her. She was so happy...which led her to a more sobering thought. What was Chris doing right now? She wondered. Poor guy...man is she could have 5 minutes in the right with his ex- girlfriend she'd show her! Then she'd grab Chris and just make out with him right in front of the bitch...whoa...where did that come from? No she would not grab Chris and make out with him...but then...what would it be like to kiss Chris Jericho? He did have great lips...full...just perfect for kissing.  
  
Jeff frowned as he looked down at Trish. At first she had been smiling up at him, but now her eyes had a far away look and she had a goofy grin on her face. For some reason...something told him that smile wasn't meant for him.  
  
"Trish?"  
  
No response. Just the same silly grin.  
  
"Trish?!" Jeff half shouted. Trish looked up and shook her head.  
  
"Oh God, Jeff I'm so sorry." She laughed, "I'm just in a mood today. Sorry." She bit her lip guiltily.  
  
"It's okay. I have to go get ready. I'll talk to you later okay." Jeff said leaning down quickly and kissing her on the lips.  
  
"Okay, Bye." Trish said waving him off and smiling widely. As soon as he rounded the corner she turned around and smacked herself on the forehead. "What the hell is the matter with you?" She muttered out loud. "Oh my God!"  
  
"You called?" A familiar voice said behind her.  
  
"Chris??" Trish blushed.  
  
Chris had walked down the hallway to see Jeff walking away from Trish then Trish turning around and smacking herself on the head. He was intrigued and dare he say...hopeful that perhaps there was already trouble in paradise. He had been so angry when he had walked into that locker room this morning. It was amazing how much seeing a smile on Trish's face could make him feel better about everything.  
  
"Yes. You just said. 'Oh my God.' That's me right?" Chris laughed at his own joke when Trish rolled her eyes.  
  
"You're such a crackhead." She said, but couldn't help the smile that crept onto her lips. She was glad that he seemed to be relatively back to normal. Seeing Chris in despair as she had the night before had been a complete shock to her. Man, I just want to apologize and give him a hug. She thought to herself. Unbeknownst to her, the order slipped out of her lips before she even thought about it. "Come here and hug me."  
  
Chris leaned back and looked at her strangely. "Why?"  
  
Trish grimaced...stupid big mouth. Now she had to explain and remind him of what happened. "Cause, you fucking abandoned me last night after giving me this whole story with your girlfriend and I didn't know where the hell you went. I'm so sorry, I haven't been paying attention to your feelings. I mean, here I am always telling you my problems and asking you to be there for me, and when have I been there for you? Never. From now on Chris, I swear to you, that anytime you want to talk at all, I want you to talk to me. I mean..." Trish rambled, the longer she spoke the more upset she got.  
  
Chris was surprised at the guilt that Trish seemed to feel. Man if she only knew. He shook his head and stepped forward to give her a brief hug. "Trish, I know that you're there for me. I'm sorry I didn't come clean earlier, it was just something that I had a hard time sharing." He said honestly. He kissed her on the forehead briefly and took a step back.  
  
"Are you feeling better today?" She asked concernedly.  
  
"Yeah a lot better. Thanks for asking." Chris said, unable to meet her eyes. Yeah sure,he felt better when it was just him and Trish alone. But when it was all of them together...it felt like a fate worse than death.  
  
"So, umm..." Trish began. "What are you doing after the show?"  
  
"Huh?" Chris looked up in surprise.  
  
"I just was...I was thinking it would be fun if we all went out together as a group. You know...you, me, Amy, Adam, Jay, and..."  
  
"Jeff." Chris finished for her.  
  
Trish blinked confusedly, but decided to disregard the random interruption. "Well yeah, what do you think? It could be fun."  
  
Chris stared down at her. Could he handle a night with the two of them? Hell he was going to have to try he supposed if he could deal with working with them until this "thing" between Jeff and Trish was over. If it was ever over... He felt the blood drain from his face at the thought.  
  
"Chris? Are you okay?"  
  
"What? Oh yeah I'm fine. I'll think about it okay. Yeah, I'll think about it." Chris said roughly then walked away quickly from her.  
  
Trish frowned as she watched him walk away. "What the hell just happened?" She thought to herself. One minute he was fine, the next pale and freaked out. Perhaps it was just the thought of hanging out with a "couple" that freaked him out. She made a mental note not to act "couple-ish" with Jeff tonight should he come with them. Tonight...she was going to be there for Chris, and Jeff would just have to understand that.  
  
***I'm not making this easy on you guys I know...but hey, it's no piece of cake deciding who she wants...  
  
I'm sure you can probably tell that I'm leaning towards Chris right now...but we'll see what happens shall we???? 


	11. Karaoke Tears

Chapter 11

"First we can go to dinner....or we can skip it if you want...I can deal with just the karaoke or whatever cause I mean...it would be so much fun! So do you guys want to come with?" Trish asked excitedly. Adam, Jay and Amy looked at each other confusedly.

"I'm sorry again?" Adam asked.

"Karaoke! Tonight! I just think this'll be a great way to get everyone together."

"And by everyone....you mean us...here in this room, and you, Jeff and Chris?" Amy waited expectantly though she knew what the answer would be.

Trish frowned. "Yes, haven't you guys been listening? You guys, Jeff, Chris and me...all out together...what's wrong with that?" She asked rather deflatedly.

"Oh nothing....nothing!" Amy said assuredly, but cast a worried glance at Adam and Jay. "Chris is coming right?"

"Well he said he would think about it but I'm pretty sure he'll go."

Jay cleared his throat. "Then we'll all...meet up with you later."

"Okay, great! I'll see you guys!" Trish said as she turned and walked away. As soon as she was out of earshot, Adam and Jay turned to Amy.

"You think he's going to go?" Jay asked skeptically.

Adam shrugged. "Guess we'll see."

"What the hell happened last night Adam?" Amy asked.

"I found Chris...downstairs at the bar listening to some music and wallowing in self misery. Basically, he felt like shit, and didn't know if he could handle this crap."

"I almost slipped and told Trish last night." Amy murmured biting her lip guiltily.

Jay turned to her, his eyes wide with surprise. "Are you serious??"

"Yeah, but I turned it around and made her feel guilty...basically told her that she just shouldn't flaunt her relationship with Jeff in front of Chris."

"Why didn't you just tell her?" Adam asked frustratedly.

"Are you kidding me? And what would that do exactly? Get me in the middle of this he said, she said bullshit. No way! Chris will tell her when he's good and ready." Amy said resolutely.

Several hours later:

"Hey Chris! Chris!" Trish called out to his retreating back.

Chris stopped in mid stride and closed his eyes. He had been hoping to avoid her and the inevitable invitation to go out tonight.

"Chris?" She asked tentatively.

"Oh hey you. What's goin on?" He asked nonchalantly.

"We were supposed to go out tonight...remember?" She said looking up at his uncertainly.

"Oh yeah. I just...umm I thought we were all going to meet at the hotel." He lied uneasily.

Trish smiled. "That's so silly. Adam and Jay are at the parking lot already and they said they would give you a ride. Tonight...it's Karaoke night!"

"Karaoke huh? I'm not really sure I'm in the mood Trish."

"Come on, it'll be fun. I promise you...it'll be a great time. Please come Chris." She pleaded.

Chris stared down at those deep brown eyes and felt a tug at his heart. He just couldn't say no to this girl.

He sighed, "All right. I'll go." He finally said.

"Yes! Okay, so I have to wait for Jeff, but I'll see you guys over there. I told Adam where it is so he'll know where it is." Trish said excitedly. Chris smiled briefly at her then turned around to walk to the parking lot.

At the Karaoke Bar:

"Dude, where the hell did Trish dig this place up?" Adam asked as they entered the dimly lit room. Dozens of people were littered around a small stage where a bald man was belting out "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor.

Chris couldn't help but laugh as at the guy started to dance around.

"Maybe this won't be so bad." He mumbled under his breath.

Jay looked at him. "Anytime you want to leave Chris, just let us know. Adam and I devised a strategy to get you out of here with no problem whatsoever." He nodded assuredly.

Chris raised an eyebrow at the suggestion. "And what exactly would this strategy be?"

"Well, you just nudge me. And I'll get up to make a "phone call" and then I'll walk away and come back and pretend that Denise has some problem and I'm going to go back to the hotel and talk to her. Adam will stay here and you'll offer to drive with me. Easy."

Chris shook his head in disbelief, he couldn't believe that his friends were so concerned about him that they had already planned an escape route. "Thanks guys...but I think I'm going to try to make it through this one. It's not going to be the only time I'm going to have to hang out with both of them." He shrugged as he sighed.

"Well get ready cause here they come..." Adam whispered when he spotted Amy, Trish and Jeff walking in.

Trish tugged at Jeff and pointed to where Chris, Adam and Jay were standing. "There they are!" She said eagerly.

Jeff looked up and saw Chris there and frowned. He hadn't expected him to be there but then looking down at the happy expression on Trish's face, knew that he couldn't comment on it. Hell...both him and Chris were just going to have to act normal around her.

"Hey guys!" Amy smiled at them as she walked over. She looked pointedly at Chris and heaved a sigh of relief when he offered a small smile towards her. She had been afraid that he wouldn't be so eager to see her.

"Hey Aims." Everyone said simultaneously.

Chris met a waitress' eye and nodded his head for a round of beers for the table. He supposed that alcohol could only help this situation.

As they all sat down, a waitress came with the beers and several books to choose music from.

"You guys isn't this fun!" Trish said happily staring across the table at the three guys. Each offered her a wan smile. Jeff placed a possessive arm around Trish's shoulders and looked at Chris with a raised eyebrow. Trish didn't notice the exchange, but having promised herself earlier that evening not to act like a couple with Jeff, stealthily shook off Jeff's arm as she turned towards Amy.

Adam and Jay noticed and looked at each other in surprise.

"Aim's what song do you want to do? Let's do a duet!"

"Sure thing Trish." Amy mumbled looking down at her book.

"Babe, we've got to do the Pat Benator song!" Trish said excitedly, pointing down on the wrinkled pages of the karaoke booklet with a shiny pink fingertip.

"We Belong!" Amy yelled, before running up to the dj booth to sign up.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Chris said sulkily, rolling his eyes when Amy ran back and Trish clapped her hands excitedly as they waited for the song to come on.

"Oh come on Chris! It'll be fun!"

"I hate that song!" He murmured stubbornly. Trish walked over and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, much to his chagrin. Jeff, unbeknownst to Trish, couldn't help but frown at the familiar contact between the two friends.

"It'll be funny listening to us try to do Pat. And since you, Mr. "I'm in a Band, so I'm better than you", are here, you're just going to have to deal with it. Oh my god...I'm so ridiculously excited about this song! Ooh, we're up!" Trish squealed, and she grabbed Amy's arm as they bounded up the stage together.

We belong, we belong to the light  
Many times I've tried to tell you  
Many times I've cried alone  
Always I'm surprised how well you  
Cut my feelings to the bone

The lights shining down on Trish's face illuminated her flaxen hair and her angelic looking face. Chris couldn't help but feel rather sad as the words of the nostalgic 80's song, conjured up his feelings. His concentration was so much on the words of the song that it didn't even bother him that Amy and Trish were basically butchering the song with their interspersing giggles and shrieks.  
  
Don't want to leave you really  
I've invested too much time  
To give you up that easy  
To the doubts that complicate your mind

He really didn't want to leave her. The idea of Trish and him as a couple had so consumed his mind in the past year or so, that the very notion of abandoning it completely. But he wanted her to be happy. Hence, he had to stand aside and let her discover whatever it was between her and Jeff. No matter how much it hurt him, she should and would always be first to him. We belong to the light  
We belong to the thunder  
We belong to the sound of the words  
We've both fallen under  
Whatever we deny or embrace  
For worse or for better  
We belong, we belong  
We belong together  
  
Maybe it's a sign of weakness  
When I don't know what to say  
Maybe I just wouldn't know  
What to do with my strength anyway  
Have we become a habit  
Do we distort the facts  
Now there's no looking forward  
Now there's no turning back  
When you say

Was it really the idea of abandoning his dreams of Trish that hurt him? Or was it just that he wanted some kind of assurance of his feelings. Was he truly addicted to the feeling, or being in love? But no, it wasn't simply love. It was that he felt that Trish was an extension of him. He loved her for everything that she was. For her intelligence and her warm heart. Her beauty, of course, but it wasn't even about that. She made him laugh and feel like a better person. Wasn't that what was important? So basically, by trying to forget the way that he felt about her, he would essentially be cutting off a part of him. That part of his heart that had glorified her for so long and had held on to the hope that one day, she would be his.

Close your eyes and try to sleep now  
Close your eyes and try to dream  
Clear your mind and do your best  
To try and wash the palette clean  
We can't begin to know it  
How much we really care  
I hear your voice inside me  
I see your face everywhere  
Still you say 

It would never really be over. Somewhere in the back of his mind, would always be an image of what could have been. But for now he would let go. He would let, whatever it was that stood between them, be a part of space, that never ending void that would go on forever, just like his love for her would. She would have done it for him, because that was the kind of person she was. It was the least he could do. At the very least she was his friend, and it was only greed that made him want so much more. He stared into the beer in his hand, watching the label quiver and distort as tears came to his eyes.

We belong to the light  
We belong to the thunder  
We belong to the sound of the words  
We've both fallen under  
Whatever we deny or embrace  
For worse or for better  
We belong, we belong  
We belong together

He blinked away the tears, slyly wiping them away, the knowing that he couldn't hold it in, he simply laughed loudly, holding his stomach, pretending that the performance had reduced him to tears with laughter.

"There now, that wasn't so bad was it? You just had to take it all in and.....oh my god, I cannot believe you laughed that much!" Trish yelled indignantly when she made it back to the table and saw Chris wiping away tears.

"Yeah...it wasn't so bad." Chris said, smiling through his tears. He reached out and tucked an errant piece of hair from Trish's face. They stared at each other, smiling, hers out of true happiness that Chris seemed to be enjoying himself, his, because, well, he simply couldn't help but smile when he saw her face.

"I thought you were great baby." Jeff's voice interrupted the warm, friendly glow that had surrounded them. He wrapped a proprietary arm around Trish's waist and pulled her between his legs, tucking his chin on her shoulder as she leaned against him.

Chris watched the two of them and smiled sadly. "Right. It wasn't so bad."

Author's note: This story will be done soon damn it! I promise! I've already written the ending so I know who she'll end up with. Just a few more chapters to fill in some gaps!


End file.
